Respite care options for family carers explained

Why a break is part of good caring

If you look after a family member or friend, you have probably heard the phrase "you must look after yourself" more often than you would like. It is easier said than done. But respite is not a luxury or an admission that you have failed — it is routine maintenance. Carers who take regular, planned breaks tend to stay well for longer, and the person they support often benefits from a change of scene and a wider circle of familiar faces.

In East Anglia, the practical challenge is often geography. Support might be a forty-minute drive across Norfolk, or a bus that does not exist from a Suffolk village. That makes planning ahead more important, not less. Here is what is actually available, what it tends to cost, and how to get it moving.

Short-term residential respite

Also called a "respite stay" or "short break", this is a planned stay in a care home — usually one to two weeks, sometimes just a weekend — while you rest, go away, or simply sleep properly.

• How to arrange it: contact the home directly. Many East Anglian homes keep a small number of rooms for respite, and they book up fast around Christmas, harvest and the summer holidays. Book two to three months ahead where you can.
• Ask for a taster visit: a few hours first, then a night, then a longer stay. It is far less daunting for everyone.
• What to send: medication in a blister pack or clearly labelled boxes, continence supplies, glasses, hearing aids, familiar clothing, a favourite blanket, and a one-page summary of routine, likes and dislikes, and how they take their tea.
• Typical costs: self-funding rates in this region generally run from around £750 to £1,200 a week, depending on nursing needs and location.
• Funding: the stay may be partly or fully funded by your local authority if the person you care for has been assessed as needing it. Ask for a care needs assessment and a financial assessment.

Home sitting and sitting services

If the person you care for would rather stay put, a sitting service brings someone into the home so that you can leave — for a hospital appointment, a class, or an afternoon that belongs entirely to you.

• What it looks like: a trained sitter or support worker visits for two to four hours, offers company, makes a drink and keeps an eye on things. They do not usually provide personal care or nursing tasks unless that has been agreed in advance.
• Costs: roughly £18 to £25 an hour through an agency, often less through a council-commissioned service.
• How to find it: your county council's adult social care team, your GP surgery's noticeboard and local carers' groups are the best starting points. Ask specifically about "sitting services" rather than "home care" — the two are commissioned differently.
• A tip: start with short, low-stakes visits while you are still nearby. Trust builds quickly when the first few sessions go well.

Day centres and day opportunities

Day services give structure to the week and a genuine break to you. Most run from around 9.30am until 3pm, and transport is often available — worth asking about, because in rural parts of Norfolk and Suffolk the journey is frequently the deciding factor.

• Who they suit: people who enjoy company, activities, a hot meal and a rhythm to the day. Some centres specialise in dementia, others in physical disability or mental health support.
• Costs: commonly £35 to £60 a day, plus a small transport charge. Many places offer a half-day rate.
• Look beyond day centres: lunch clubs, Men's Shed-style groups, community transport schemes and befriending services all count as a break, even when they are not labelled as respite.

Other options worth knowing about

• Shared Lives: the person you care for is matched with an approved household and stays with them for short breaks — a homely alternative to a care home, available across the region.
• Direct payments: if the council assesses a need, you can take the money as a payment and arrange your own support. This gives you far more flexibility over who comes and when.
• Extra care and supported housing: some schemes offer short-term tenancies or trial stays, which can work well as a stepping stone.
• Supported holidays: a week away with support, either for the person you care for or for both of you together.

How to arrange respite in East Anglia

Start with a carer's assessment from your county council — Norfolk, Suffolk, Cambridgeshire or Peterborough. It is free, it is your right under the Care Act 2014, and it can lead to funding or services specifically for you as a carer, separate from whatever the person you care for receives. Ask for a care needs assessment for them at the same time; the two together unlock the widest range of options.

Then be practical about timing. Local services vary from town to town, waiting lists exist, and rural transport needs booking. Write down what you actually want — a weekly afternoon, one weekend a month, a fortnight in September — and ask for that, rather than waiting to be offered something that does not quite fit.

Finally, tell someone. Carers' groups, hospital discharge teams, GP surgeries that keep a carer register and local voluntary organisations all pass on news of new services. You are not asking for a favour by wanting a rest. You are keeping something going that matters.